“feeling blue” – a monologue

I started,

feeling blue..

cold waves

nerves down

frozen blood

broken warmth in pieces

dreadful cloudy weather

fearful stormy winds

blew me away ..

to a barren frozen land

thrusting me

heartbeats complained

panting I denied breathing

but had to

it did freeze body moist to depth

With frozen tissues and blood..

I walked on..

slipping and sliding snowy sheets ..

trying to hold on

couldn’t keep me warm

it choked me to dumb

it made me..

a stone stucking  in the standstill snow

dying every second..

feeling dizzy.. impossibly alive



wait a minute..

Don’t you dare to give me that

same cold look again!

you know what,

I started..

feeling blue




our unending journey..

me, you and horizon

no less to a heaven..

warmth of our hands gripped

kept us heated

with a desire to touch ..

..the destination led by roads

full of dust, thorns and stones..

together we measured..

length of  million lives.. a million times

in seconds..

lost in eye-lands

we surpassed every pass..

..rocks and plates

nothing could keep us ..away

no gulches, no ravines..

together we marched.

and never changed 

the way.. I fear and you boost

you burn, I sooth

I regret, you thank

I complain, you explain

you shout, I cry

I cry, you melt

you melt, I smile

you smile, I melt..



Smile that..

made me forget every other curve

on our unending journey..

Warmth that ..

couldn’t stop me crossing

bridges .. of

interwoven, intermingled

rules, questions, hatred ..

redeemed we went on

careless of



undesirable fate..

quenched our painful thirst

with ocean of tears

sky witnessed drop

of every tear shed..

..onto path of sublimity,


purity, that turned tears  into crystals

of the abode of dreams..

our dreams..

our promises..

to last forever


our journey

to go on

and on




So discouraging..

So discouraging..

you see

your closed ones

Judging you

very moment .. you try to be just you

their wit dies..

You crossed your lines, showed your instincts

You are  judged a stupid character

A kind criminal

You will be in prison – of rules…

Rules they made – many of’em

you are bound to be quiet

Each and every word you speak,

will be used against you

how can you chose to be innocent and stupid before them?


How could you?

They are the Closest-one,

chosen-one, loved-one

And you behaved stupidly?


What happened to their being of known-one

Why don’t they get you?

Is it a sign of

knowing nothing about you?

or a sign knowing nothing about anything?

They kept witnessing

your abilities,

and dis-abilities

forever and …

now they question who are you.

Why are you like this?

What is your type?

do you answer?

Why do you need to show ?..

every while ..

everywhere that


..have a way out

..have a vision of life

..can see world with your glittering eyes

..have dreams

..have a past, present and future

..have a soul

..can judge but you don’t..

and YOU TOO is a child of Him


the holiness of all, the most sacred of all

the most loved and worshipped

the almighty



No rituals before him.. no need to act..

He never judges,

loves you for who you are

He created you to learn

see the world with His eyes..

He blesses you.. He pours his power on you..

each and every action of yours


a live proof of His being and


you are not wrong

when you chose to be JUST YOU

Iisten to your heart … Its no crime

its just you..

loving and caring

an image of your pure soul,

HIS pure soul..



so discouraging

while you forget this fact